You know, truth be told, I started to type this thing up in an iMessage reply to someone who I now firmly believe qualifies for the title of “true narcissist.”1
But then I thought better of myself and went, “Why the hell would you bother to type up all this stuff up to someone who literally doesn’t give a s&%*t what I think, type or do to try to help “mend a wrong” when you know, deep down inside, you’ve been playing a sinister game with that same someone who’s been toying with your emotions and crap from day one?!?!?
Original, unsent iMessage to someone I started to send but later cancelled with described such individual:
Do you know what the difference between an “occasional narcissist” and a full-time, “true narcissist” is? Because I do. The occasional narcissist will do, say and act on things on impulse and often selfish, immoral and defensive choices. Yes, many, many times misgiven, directed and outright “wrong all the way around.” The occasional narcissist knows when they’ve done wrong and are later repentant and feel bad inside about the the things they said, done or acted upon and will, one way or the other, do whatever they can over the course of time to try their best to somehow mend the wound, hurt and discomfort they have caused due to their selfish, self-reenforcing, defiant and yes, at times delusional and seemingly “unforgiveable” outbursts. They generally feel “bad” when they’ve done harm to others and will do whatever they can within their limited control to - at the very least - establish a place of mutual respect and peaceful environment for all parties involved. Aah, but alas, that is wherein the true narcissist lies waiting in great vain, and disdain, for their now “seemingly cowardly” prey to once again come limping back on the killing fields with offers of remorse, charity, honor, renewed friendship if that could somehow even be possible, but most importantly, they lie in weight of…
And that’s where I got to…
Ready? Set? Go! Cause here I go on a little journey I just now decided to call “Narcissists Playbook Payback Time!”
You see, true narcissists out there, I’ve been a full-time, true narcissist myself many times in my life. Or at least I think so. Others might disagree, but that’s where I’m “hard on myself.”
Heck, I like to think I've managed to come up with quite a number of unique "plays" of my own along the way.2 A self-certified "Master Manipulator" at times indeed!.3 Almost like a calling card for me.4
But, alas, I’ve also seen the evil and impure things that it does to others. And I genuinely regret the bad decisions that I’ve made in my past. And you other “true narcissists” should too!
But if you’ve somehow managed to harden your heart to the point of seemingly no-possibility-of-return normalicy, just remember this little passage from the Good Book that seems to differ from your misdirected, warped “world view”:
I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit in you; I will remove from you your heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh. - Ezekiel 36:26
Don’t believe it can work? Well, you’re reading words typed on a page that contains sentences and paragraphs of text from someone who in a “past life” (not literally, jeez!) was once much like you!
But, enough with all that! This page isn’t for you fellow narcissists! It’s for “them!” That’s right, your prey. Your “victims!
You know, the folks that have suffered from all of your misdeeds and ill repute???
Game on! See you on the ice you "true" narcissistic MFrs! 🏒🥅5
*Have a complaint, suggestion or concern? Hit me up using this feedback form.
Footnotes
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What’s the difference between a [as I term them] “true narcissist” as opposed to the occasional, part-time “sorry, I was being a jerk. I feel bad. Please forgive me” kind of narcissist? Well, I’ll be going into that subject shortly. ↩
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See! Right there for all the world to see! That’s prideful, pure narcissistic talk! ↩
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Something any “true” narcissist would never say because it might expose them for who they truly are. ↩
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OMG! After I typed all that up and went back to reread it, almost sounds like I’m still prideful of such abhorrent behavior! (which I promise, I’m truly not…or at least I don’t want to be any longer). Sorry, that was not my intent, and yet, it still managed to bring itself to the surface :( Can you at least see where I’m going with all this though? ↩
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Dang it! There I go once again with the vile anger :(. Even if I think at that moment that it’s for a “good cause”, doesn’t mean I should allow myself to say such things! So, you may ask, why am I leaving that in there? Two reasons actually.
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So you my valued website guests can take note and “identify” that trait associated with narcissism - whether it be the “true or “occasional” type of narcissist.
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Simply to highlight that I still struggle with my old “demons” from time-to-time still to this day. For a bit more on that subject - as well as the reason I [once again] included the Youtube song video above on this page, visit the page Spark of Life also located on this website.
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